Fake News

Homeowner – Where did spider go?

A homeowner was today plunged into worry when a spider they had been tracking has disappeared

I was tracking it to see if it was going to come near me, as I was in bed. I went to get a brush so I could deal with it humanely, and when I returned it was gone

Ryder Talbot, Ohio, has been in shock ever since. He now opens things quite slowly just in case the spider resurfaces.

It wasn’t a big spider. Or poisonous, but its the principle. I mean It is in my house you know. You play by my rules

Ryder has hired pest control to fumigate the house in order to get a nights sleep.

I read somewhere that we eat 3 spiders a night on average. I can’t afford to sleep!

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